Trip To Colombia To Say GoodBye To My Dad

Colombia: My father was ill again so I came to help him get better.

Still Hard To Talk About… Writing this has taken me 8 months…

(August 24 – 31 2015)

My Sad Story:

Sunday August 23, 2015 – Decided to go back to Colombia for my Dad. He is not doing well and I want to help him get better.

Monday August 24, 2015 – My flight to Bogota Colombia was at 10AM. I arrived at Bogota Colombia at around 1PM Monday morning. I got to the airport and got a text messages from my brothers Ruben and Giovanni. I got worried something happened to my Dad while I was flying. Got news that the doctor wanted to send Dad to another hospital because now his kidneys were starting to fail. So he needed permission from a family member and Ruben and Gio said they wanted for us to decide together. I went from the airport straight to hospital. I called Mom and told her to meet me at the hospital. When I got to the hospital I saw Mom waiting for me. She always looks the same. She is my beautiful Angle. I get tears thinking and talking about my Mom. I gave her a BIG hug and kiss. We cried a bit but it was good. We went inside the hospital and went to see Dad. It is always a pain to get in and out of the hospital in Colombia. I was finally allowed inside and I couldn’t believe how Dad looked lying in the bed. I felt like falling down and I needed a couple of seconds to walk next to him. This is my Dad, my Hero and I love him. Why GOD Is This Happening I Kept Thinking. Please take him if it is your will. I put on hand in his heart and I prayed.

He looked like he was sleeping and I didn’t know if he can talk or even understand me. I talk to him and told him “Papi it’s me “Sergio”. I LOVE YOU and I here for you. Thank you for everything you did for me. If you feel like it is time for you to go see GOD then go. Don’t worry about us because I don’t want to see you suffer. “I LOVE YOU”. I started to cry because he doesn’t move and he is just there. He arms are so swallow and so are his feet. His tongue is on the side of his mouth like it hasn’t moved. His eyes were taped closed with tape because they were swallow. They put tape over his eyes because they won’t completely close. It is very sad and very hard to deal with. This experience is very horrible.

I found the doctor and he explain that my Dad issue is at the ending phase because he is not getting better. Right now he has 3 big issues. Three of his main organs are failing – Lungs, Heart and Kidneys. We know his lungs have the Fibrosis issue. Now because his lungs are not functioning well his heart is getting weak. In the last 24 hours his kidneys are failing him because he can urinate. Each of these issue create other issues. The idea is to move him to another hospital so they can help him with his kidney by putting him on dialysis. On dialysis we can only hope he will get better. Right now everything they do or are doing has not shown any improvement. There is a chance that something bad can happen to him if we move him. So I ask the doctor that we basically only have 2 choices: just keep him here and keep waiting for a miracle or move him to the other hospital so he can get dialysis and see what happens. I am sitting with doctor thinking what should I do? “I am the only one here and I want the best for my Dad. I cannot stand to see him like this. I believe the best thing is to try and move him and see if he can improve. It is God will and God will decide to take him.” I didn’t know what is best but I decided to move him. I am really sorry Ruben and Gio that I didn’t talk to you before I decided but I didn’t want to keep him waiting and not trying to help him. So the doctor started the process to move Dad to another hospital. I have to wait outside while they get things ready and get an ambulance. I am really sorry. It hurts me inside to see him like this but you have to understand I alone here. I didn’t have a way to contact my brothers right now.

I told mom and Tia to go home and wait for me. I was going to travel with my Dad in ambulance to another hospital. Once we get there I would call them. I got to the hospital around 2PM and now it is about 8pm I was getting upset because I am still waiting and started to look for help. They asked me to make quick decisions for what? I am just sitting here in a waiting room just waiting. Finally they told me to go home because it was going to take awhile. Total bullshit… I got home and finally got some food around 11PM.

Tuesday August 25, 2015 Today at 4am I got a call from the hospital that my Dad was being transferred and I needed to be at hospital A.S.A.P. Lucky that the hospital is close by so I got a taxi and got there in about 15 minutes. After about 2 hours of waiting again at the hospital we got into an ambulance and went to the new clinic. At the new clinic I had to wait a bit while they setup my Dad in new bed. I asked to speak to the doctor but I had to wait. Of course it might be a while.

The doctor basically said he doesn’t have much information from the other hospital. From what he sees my Dad is not in good conditions. He looks like he is getting lots of medicine at high volumes to help him recover but he is not responding. That is why he is swollen and has lots of dark spots. The process the doctor will do is replace my Dads current medicine and give him some other medicine to get him really for dialysis. He is not sure if he can handle it because the process requires him to be stronger. What happens is blood needs to flow out of his body through a machine and back into his body. If he is not strong enough he can go into cardiac arrest and his heart can fail. He said this medicine could take about 6 hours to get him ready for dialysis. If at the end he cannot handle dialysis then they cannot do anything but just wait. After waiting for a while the doctor said he is not responding to any medicine because his body is not showing any improvements. He did mention that they would do some test on his intestine. I was able to stay with him a bit so I talked to him. I told him we love him and we are proud of him. I always put my hand on his heart when I talk to him. It is not easy to see him like this and worst him not responding. After I while they told me I couldn’t stay longer because they needed to do some rounds. Also if I can get him some supplies. He needed men’s diapers, soap, toothbrush, toothpaste and a razor. They wanted to give him a bath I believe. So I left to get the supplies. Once I came back I was told visiting hours are from 11am – 12pm and from 4pm – 5pm and I couldn’t see him. I was so mad because they told me before I could stay as long as I wanted because of my Dad’s condition.

I called Martha my cousin if she could come and get me so I can go home for a bit. While driving home I got a call from the hospital. They were looking for me and wanted me to come back to the hospital. I got back tand found the doctor, he said my Dad was not getting better and we need to start getting ready for the end. They cannot do dialysis because he is too weak. That his liver was also failing. I was in shock and wanted to scream. I asked the doctor how much time do he have? He said he was not sure but he has minutes to hours. I told the doctor I needed to go home and get my mother so she can say Goodbye to my Dad. I got home and I called my Ruben and Gio and told them the sad news. I asked them to please send me a video of them saying Goodbye so I can play it to my Dad in his ear. Mom was really nervous so Martha and I decided to talk my Mom out to eat something before we went to the hospital.

Once we got back to the hospital we asked to talk to the doctor again so he could explains to my Mom and Martha. We each went inside to say Goodbye to my Dad. My Mom was heart broken and you can see her pain but she was trying to stay strong and quiet. I couldn’t stop crying while I was with him and I would talk to him. I LOVE YOU Daddy. I understood it was GODS will but it wasn’t easy. I played the videos of Ruben and Giovanni saying Goodbye to my Dad. That was so hard to be there and experience that and I just kept hoping he would so how respond. The doctor said due to his conditions we could stay as longs, as we wanted. Sometimes I would go to the waiting room because it was awful to sit and just watch him just lay they and watch him die. My Mom and Martha would stay in the waiting room because it was too much for them. While we were in the waiting room we heard my Dads name and that he was going to surgery. So we asked what is happening. Another doctor checked him during the day and said he had some issues with his intestines. So the intestine doctor wanted to do surgery on him because of some result he found. I ask to talk to this doctor about the surgery. He said that he found that part of my Dad’s intestine was bad and he believed if he can remove it that it would help his organs recover slowly. What? There is a sign he can improve? The only issue is that he is very weak and not ready for surgery. He said lets wait about an hour and he will check on him again. We were confused because first doctor is telling us that there is nothing we can do while the other doctor said he believes this can help. This doctor believes that everyone was just checking his lungs and not his intestines. This would explain why my Dads stomach is so swollen. My Mom and I talked and we both agreed that lets go for the surgery. We just wanted to first talk to the first doctor. He said the same thing as before that he is not improving and wouldn’t be able to have surgery but he was going to talk to the intestine doctor.

William came by to visit my Dad and that he was heart broken to hear the news. We went to see my Dad together and we prayed together for that miracle. I would sit next to him and holding his hand. I would rub his chest and kiss him so many times. I just couldn’t believe this was happening. My Mom wasn’t doing well so I asked Martha to please take her home. I asked the doctor how did he know my Dad was not improving and his health was declining. He said that the heart beat rate and tension rate on the monitor should not keep declining. So sitting there watching his heart beat rate dropping from 70 to 68 to 65 to 55 to 44 to 35 to 22 to 20 to 14 to the end was HORRIBLE. Watching my Dad die was HORRIBLE. This process took about 3 to 4 hours. I cried so much when it dropped under 10….

My Dad took his last breath at 8:11PM. I know it sucked and it was HORRIBLE to sit there and watch before I didn’t want him to be alone. After a few minutes with him I went outside to breath. I walked outside the hospital for a bit and found WIFI. I decided to call my brothers. It was very difficult to tell them and it hurts so much.

After his death they said I needed to get paperwork done, like his death certificate and some other forms. I needed my Mom and my Dad’s ID. So I had to call her so she can come back to the hospital. That part kind of sucked for her. Martha was a big help with all this paperwork. She called my Dads insurance about the funeral company so they could come get my Dads body and do their paperwork. We also had to arrange the funnel for tomorrow. I wanted to go to the hospital morgue to see my Dad one last time. This was a bad idea because it was HORRIBLE to watch my Dads body just wrapped in a blanket with a nametag on him. He was alone in a table outside the hospital in a little room. I just didn’t like how they treated him. We had to wait about 2 hours until the funeral company came by to pickup my Dads body. They finally got here around 11:30 PM so we said our final Goodbye. It’s HORRIBLE to look at a death body but it’s worst when it is someone that you LOVE. What a bad feeling I had inside. We got home late and went to bed. I slept with my Mom so she would be OK and I also wanted to sleep in my Dads bed.

Wednesday August 26, 2015 – Today is the viewing… It was a long and sad day yesterday. This morning was rough because everywhere you looked we had reminders of my Dad. We got ready so we could go to the funeral home to get things ready for the viewing at 1 PM. We had to do some more paperwork and arrangement for cremation. I bought my Dad a nice box for his ashes. I asked if we could see his body before the viewing because I wanted to see how my Dad looked after they cleaned him up. I don’t want to do an open casket if my Dad didn’t look well. I was happy with what they did so he would look nice in the viewing. He still didn’t look at our Dad but he went through a lot in these last couple of days. Once the viewing started we just sat around talking. During the day family and friends came to visit him. He was loved by so many and so many told us stories of how great my Dad was. It was a sad day but also a nice day was lots of great memories. He received some nice flower arrangements from family and even my job (Dun & Bradstreet). I was sad during the day because I was missing my Dad but I was happy to see so many people showing there love for him. It was it a long day.

Thursday August 27, 2015 – This day we just stayed home talking about what is next.

The next couple of days were rough because we had to more on. I still can’t get images of my dad last days.

I know GOD had a plan so I am Happy my Dad is with GOD now resting.

LOVE YOU ALWAYS PAPI….

Sergio

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